everything You do is just and true

This morning at church I was struck by the words in this song by Brenton Brown. "Everything You do is just and true."  I never realized how powerful these words are or that I would actually be at a place where I was questioning them. My aunt died from colon cancer a few days ago, right on the heels of my return from Uganda, and I feel like I have been inundated with suffering.

The deep pain I feel for my uncle and my dear cousins is unreal. I have no idea what it feels like to lose a mother, a spouse, a brother, a son.. or all four for that matter. I know my friends in Uganda have experienced pain like this too. It's truly tragic. I want to scream that life is unfair, that God made some horrible decisions, but I know deep down I don't believe that.  Oddly enough, I was reminded of a sermon I heard a few months back while visiting a Solid Rock Church in Portland.  They were going through the bible studying 2 Corinthians and the message was titled "Why God allows suffering to happen".  I had my notes from that sermon in my hand today and didn't even know it.

These were the reasons God allows suffering to happen:
1. To comfort others
2. To help a watching world see God in your coping
3. Because of the coming judgment (purges you from sin)
4. We know God best in times of suffering

Life is so precious and so unbelievably short.  In no way am I trying to minimize the pain of death, but I have found joy in the little things this weekend; spending time with my beautiful pregnant cousin, a phone call from my little brother, running in the rain, having Saturday morning breakfast with my mom, her sister, my cousin and her family, and loving on my sweet little nephew at church.